I know you are going to hear this, but there ARE a range of reactions to personal narrative essays. You ask too many adults for feedback, you WILL find an adult who hates what you wrote.
Have you ever loved a book and eagerly passed it on to your best friend only to have her tell you she couldn’t stand it and gave up on it in disgust?
You may write a draft of your common app essay that your English teacher loves that you proudly present to your high school counselor only to have him shake his head in disgust and tell you it’s trash and to start over again.
So what do you do?
You remember that this is YOUR essay. If you have done your job well, you know what your English teacher looks for in a strong common app essay and what your college counselor hopes to see in a strong essay. You know what appeals to your junior English teacher which may be very different from what your senior English teacher likes to see.
Let me share a true story. One of my former students worked very hard on his common app for Northwestern over a decade ago. We workshopped it in my class, and I thought it was one of the best essays of the year.
The day that it was due, he wanted me to look at his final draft before he hit the send button and submitted his application.
When he went to my classroom for that final stamp of approval, I wasn’t there.
So, he went to his English teacher from his junior year and asked him to look at his final draft. My colleague read it, shook his head, and told him in no uncertain terms that it was not his best work and encouraged him to write a new essay.
For a moment, he panicked. Then, he talked himself down.
He knew what his junior teacher preferred to see in an essay.
He knew what I preferred to see.
They were very different.
He thought about it for a moment and decided his style was more in alignment with what I want to see from my students.
He submitted his application, and he was subsequently admitted to Northwestern.
Believe me, I could easily share another story of a student rejecting my feedback and running with the opinion of that same colleague who was accepted to the college in question.
At the end of the day, this is YOUR application. Not mine. Not my colleague’s. YOURS. I think when you have nailed your essay, you will know it.
Years ago, I had a student who referred to his strong religious faith in his essay for a secular state university. His counselor told him to strip it from his response for fear the admissions counselor would find it offensive. The student came to me flooded with emotion. I told him his counselor was simply trying to protect him, and I asked him a hypothetical question.
I asked him if he would want to attend a university that would reject him for his conservative religious views. Choking up with emotion, he said, “Absolutely not, Fisch.” I told him to put the religious anecdotes back into his application and hit the send button. He did. He was accepted.
Had he not been accepted, he was ready to accept the consequences.
Let’s be real. Some teachers prefer a stripped-down essay that cuts straight to the point. Another teacher prefers an essay that is further developed with analogies and more metaphorical language. Which one is more your style?
A final note: sharing your essay with your parents early in the process is highly problematic. A number of my friends have admitted they had a firm idea of what their high school senior should write and how they should write it.
They are too emotionally invested in what you write.
Ask them to sit tight and wait until you are much further along in the process.
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