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Writer's picturePam Fischer

Polite Stalking 101

Make. Things. Happen. College, internships, and jobs.




In addition to teaching my students how to write resumes, interview with a prospective admissions rep, and write solid essays, I taught them how to put themselves out there to land leadership positions in college, internships, and jobs. I shared examples of risks prior students took to make opportunities happen long after they graduated from our school.


One of my students renamed “the college unit” as “the life unit.”


I have had former students from recent years and former students from decades ago reach out to me for advice about applying to med school, law school, internships, and jobs.

How did I personally learn Polite Stalking 101? Life experience.


I did my student teaching overseas in Cheltenham, England, in 1988. I lived with a wonderful host family who had two daughters who were five and seven. While they were gracious hosts, they pretty much left me to myself. They were used to boarding local art college students who did not want to interact with the family.


I wanted to be a part of their family, so I called a family meeting and told them just that.


I told them that I wanted to go to the grocery store with them.


I wanted to go with them to the local parks.


It changed everything.


If I hadn’t reset the boundaries with my host family, I would have had a lovely ten weeks in their home, and we might have exchanged Christmas cards until those cards would have dwindled away.

Instead, they are truly my British family.


When I returned to England to teach at a boarding school in 1991, I took the bus to visit them. My parents flew out to meet my host family that same year.


When I studied in Oxford in the summer of 2001, the girls took the bus to visit me.


When I studied in Edinburgh in the summer of 2008, the girls took the train to see me; it was Lizzie’s first time in Edinburgh.


When Holly got married two weeks after Prince William and Kate Middleton married, I flew to Cheltenham for their wedding.


Most recently, I visited my British family in the summer of 2019 after losing my mother.


Lizzie and Holly hope to visit me here in Tucson when their children are older; they have never been to America.


I made that happen.


When I decided I wanted to teach in the high school where I did my student teaching, I was told the principal doesn’t meet with student teachers. So I told him that Indiana University’s School of Educator had a new requirement that student teachers schedule an “exit interview” with the principal.


My principal met with me, and I told him about my student teaching experience and laid out the case for being an excellent addition to their staff.


After he hired me, he said, “So, you made up the ‘exit interview,’ didn’t you?” I smiled and admitted that I had done so. He said, “I thought so. You were the first student teacher I have talked to in years. That took guts. Good for you.”

I made that happen.


When I wanted to return to England to teach early in my career, I mailed in my applications and waited. Nothing. So, I decided to cold call the principals of high schools in England, Scotland, Wales, and Ireland.


I developed a quick elevator speech asking if I could have just five minutes of their time to make the case for why they should hire me.


The principal of ACS International in Cobham, Surrey, told me that he had no need for an English teacher in the fall of 1990. I said, “While you may not have a projected opening yet, you never know when that situation might change. I simply want to share with you my experience with both the AP (Advanced Placement) and IB (International Baccalaureate) programs and had student taught in Cheltenham.”


Within days, he called me back and told me that his librarian had just informed him she was returning to Texas. He would be bumping an English teacher into her spot, and he did, indeed, now need another English teacher.

He asked me if I was free for an impromptu interview.


Of course I was.


At the end of the interview, he offered me the job. I asked him about the salary and then I asked for forty eight hours to consider the offer. After I ran the numbers and realized I could make the salary work, I accepted that job.


I made that job in England happen.


While I was cold calling schools in the United Kingdom, by the way, I was also cold calling schools in the greater Indianapolis area.


I DID have one building principal in Indianapolis who chewed me out for contacting him directly. He said, “Do you not know how to read our application? It says right across the top, ‘Do not contact building administrators or department chairs.’” I replied, “Yes, I saw that. My application has been on file with your district for two years. And I have never heard from you. I realize that teachers give notice that they are leaving all of the time, and I would simply like five minutes of your time to tell you why I would be a strong addition to your English department.” He told me he wasn’t interested, and then he hung up on me. Oh well.


So if you DO want to cold call some companies, prepare yourself for an initial negative response.


Recognize that what you are doing is a bold move, and then remind them that people give notice on a regular basis, and you would like to make your case on why they should hire you.

The principal of a large high school in Indianapolis was amused by my initial cold call. Toying with me, she said, “Ok, Pam Fischer. I will meet you on Friday at 9 a.m. Don’t be late. You only have five minutes.”


I cleared my calendar for the entire morning, and I went to that meeting with my resume in hand. About two minutes into the interview, she smiled, excused herself, and asked her secretary to clear her calendar for the next three hours. She returned, sat down, and she said, “Right. And now your real interview begins.”


She interviewed me for over an hour, took me on a tour of the building, and introduced me to the head of the English department.


Remember, this is while I was also trying to secure a job in the United Kingdom.


After I accepted the job in England, Mrs. Hanna offered me a job in her high school in Indianapolis. I told her about my job offer in England, and she said, “Go to England! You are young. You don’t have a mortgage or a family to hold you back. We will be here for you when you return to Indiana.”


And I returned to work with her for the next twenty years of my career.


I made that job in that large suburban school happen.


As I share my polite stalking stories with my students and clients, I encourage them to take risks in pursuing internships, jobs, and other opportunities to pursue their dreams.




Let me share a few examples of how my students have learned to politely stalk people in positions of power.


One of my students knew in her senior year that she wanted to go to law school. A colleague had a practicing lawyer speak to her class. At the end of the class, this young woman approached him and thanked him for coming. She shared her hopes of going to law school and asked him if she might intern with him that summer before leaving for college that following August. He said yes. He took her to court for some of his cases and let her shadow various individuals in his law firm.


She made that happen.


One of my former students wanted to have a meaningful internship at NASA. She landed an initial internship with them that was disappointing. What did she do? She did her homework and found the names of individuals within NASA who might be able to help her learn more about the organization. So, she “cold called” them by emailing them to explain that she was interning there and would like to treat them to coffee and pick their brains about what they do and how they got there.


Fast forward a couple of years when this young woman applied to intern at NASA again through the appropriate channels. Crickets. So, what did she do? She got out her notes of those individuals she met while she was there, and she wrote each of them expressing a desire to intern with them. One of those individuals responded and told her he would love to have her intern with him.


She made that happen.


Another graduate of mine was one of our student managers of the men’s basketball team while he was in high school. While he attended the University of Arizona, he was a student manager for the men’s basketball program.


Shortly after he transferred to Indiana University, he saw the man who had just been hired to be the head coach of the men’s basketball program in Bloomington on Kirkwood, a street adjoining the campus.


He approached him with a big smile on his face, extended his hand, and said, “Welcome to Indiana University. We are so excited you are here. I was a student manager for your brother at the University of Arizona.”


By the end of their conversation, the new coach told him to go to his new office near Assembly Hall and make an appointment with his secretary if he was interested in being a student manager for him.


That young man made that happen.


I am proud to say I have many more examples of former students of mine using polite stalking to make things happen in their lives. A number of my former students asked professors they admired if they could conduct research with them either in a laboratory setting or out in the field.


When it comes to positions of leadership at the collegiate level, a number of my graduates were astute in seeking out positions that may have been overlooked by others but had tremendous potential.

He noted that his university’s union board had an opening for an event planner and recognized how lucrative the position might be. He updated the original resume he created in my class, brushed up on his interview skills, and secured the position.


He eventually was the first person to book Trevor Noah to speak at Indiana University.


When I drove down to see Trevor Noah speak, I glowed with pride knowing that my former student made that happen.





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About

The College Application Whisperer

Pam Fischer is a recently retired high school English teacher who has been advising high school seniors on their college applications both in and out of the classroom for over 30 years. Most recently, she led a 3-session workshop in the summer of 2023 for Macedonian teachers instructing them about how to best advise their students on how to apply to colleges in America.

 

In her spare time, Pam is proud of having just reached a new ranking of being a 2.5 pickleball player, and she aspires to be decent enough that others are willing to play with her.

 

For more, check out her videos on TikTok or see more from The College Application Whisperer blog.

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